Scent
Sat, 21 Apr 2007 at 10:51am
untitled
This hallway smells of boys,
boys pretending.
Pretending they didn’t forget to shower today,
or yesterday, or the day before.
Sprayed for love; more the hope of a good fuck.
This hallway smells of lies.
This hallway lies to you,
just as an old woman claims to read your fortune.
She says you’ll die in a week
and your soul will never find peace.
This hallway lies to you,
like a magazine cover screams,
“look like this and you’ll be loved!”
Sprayed for love; more the hope of a good fuck.
This hallway smells of lies.
Five others like this.
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"like a magazine cover screams/'look like this and you'll be loved!'" Nice. Reminds me of all those awful Axe commercials (judging by kluny's comment, I'm assuming you've seen them in your neck of the woods, too?). Good job. +1
i hate those stupid body sprays... and i hate the supposed 'sex appeal' that everyone tries so hard to have... but i like this piece... +1
Thanks uys..and as to Kluny...we don't have 7th graders. We have 8 - 12...but guys at my school...almsot all grades have obsessions. I hate it so much though. it smells sooooo bad. I like being able to smell a person I'm attracted to. It's usually why I am. Phermones = good.
I completely agree with you, Alise. Pheromones DO= good. This is such a truthful slice of life. I always find those deoderant commercials LUDICROUS and the fact that a lot of guys buy into them is depressing to me...a lot like how a lot of girls buy into the 'screaming' magazines. +1
In Britain, the deodorants own smell. Being without a scent designed for others pleasure by capitalism is almost tabboo.
+1
I hate boys who think puerto rican showers cover their daily hygienic needs. Most guys here have grown out of it and indeed, since I hang around with the frisbee boys so much, boys that have used something stronger than old spice deodorant after their last shower are a rarity. I find I can even appreciate a touch of Axe now. It's utterly surprising. XD
Those marketing gimmicks were created to make eyes roll. As overpowering odors go, they've made a mastery to mock.
Illustrated with ease, my friend.
Thammoc Chosen Comment
oldd has a point. and some alliteration.
I am vaguely reminded of villanelles, but only because I have been going though like fifty thousand of them in Creative Writing. I like how the repetitions do so much without sounding tired or copy-paste...y.
Quite possibly the worst instance of dude-spray was when Old Spice sent the team 100 sample packs of spray and body wash -- and considering we were only fifty strong on a good , non-running day, you can do the math.
Thammoc Chosen Comment