the state of lonliness
untitled
The state of loneliness:
Inflicted by physical barriers, the decisions of the subject, the decisions of a third party, beliefs, intellect, or miscommunications.
Sadness, sometimes. Tries not to think of things. Generally buries mind in busy little day-to-day tasks. Allows brain to (figuratively) melt. Body begins to bloat from inactivity. Imaginings grow dark, and are, at times, strong, too rapid to communicate. Themes of triumph and alienation are present. Keeps a “pleasant” vast emptiness inside of self. Does not yet realize condition.
Anger, often with a brief surfacing of reality. Things which are impossible to ignore rise up from the past, to speak as avatars for distant friends, often recalling unpleasant past events. May be a passive-aggressive response to seeming abandonment. Brain becomes over-active, though imaginings become hazy, difficult to summon, and often hollow. That which is communicated is often formed slowly, with such bleak themes as imminent or unending death.
Resignation, eventually. Obsession with the past has died down, after another, larger experience of reality has scared the subject, and thus the inner demons, generally through a series of epiphanies. Abandonment is seen as self-inflicted. Imagination is seen as unoriginal and untrustworthy. These realizations enable the subject to better control the mind. Becomes more physically active, and begins (masochistically) to plan a public event in which it will be forced to undergo a social immersion, generally encouraged by a third party.
Fucking camp-outs.
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gahhh. I couldn't quite understand it... I didn't understand the context mostly, probably just that I'm a bit brain-dead at the moment...