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puretechieg

Eleven Fifty-Five

200
Mon, 11 Dec 2006 at 11:12pm

untitled

I have five minutes. Shut off the lights. My eyes crave Orion's glow. I have four minutes. Turn down the radio. My voice thinks a wish. I have three minutes. Place this pillow. My head calls for rest. I have two minutes. Straighten the covers. My body tingles for comfort. I have one minute. Cover ears with blankets. My heart speaks a beat. Half a minute. Stillness. My consciousness surrenders to peace.
One other likes this.
2006-12-11
The commendations this piece recieved in IF1 were: 0 minus votes, 1 plus votes, and 0 astars.
snaptogether
2006-12-11

Hmm.. First off, I hate you if you can fall to sleep in five minutes! The reason I am awake right now is because I cannot hardly fall asleep at all. Anyway, interesting idea for a poem, not my favorite, but interesting.

razzle_bedazzlez
2006-12-12

very nice i like it. wish i could fall asleep in poetry. i have a slight case of insomnia but it's kind of cool. keep it up

puretechieg
2006-12-12
Oh trust me I can't fall asleep in five minutes. Insomniacs unite! Well I mean, how many awesome things do we miss while we're in dreamland anyway? Hmm...there's a prompt I might take myself up on...
dan
2007-03-01
Short, to the point, encompassing what's necessary. I like it.