Behemoth (conceptual)
Tue, 22 May 2007 at 06:24pm
The Behemoth
I'm hiding here
Swirled darkness around me
Twirling
High pitched noise spirals down
Engulfs me
The Narwhal is searching
Soon he shall find me
Hidden here as I am
Amongst the seas of the moon
Osiris sheds a tear for my plight
To little to late
I must move on
My footfalls slow and heavy
In the darkness of the moons sea
Scarlet mist rises
Clotting
The blued eyes seek me
Through silvered noise
Long of Tusk
Short of Temper
The Behemoth seeks me
Through the inky pall
Angelic tones call me
"Pay it no heed child"
Mutters the Jakal to my right
Heavy Robes fluttering akimbo in the light
And so I shall turn
And face the Narwhal
For it is better to seek your own truth
Than take the word
Of the Jakal in priests robes...
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I love that second to last stanza. Through backs to encyclopaedias I used to read as a child. Narwhales are fabulous animals.
I liked that. Very nice work.
Very nice. Again, wonderful imagery. I really like that about your pieces. I feel bad that I can't say much more than that, but I will note that I dig how you subtely refer to the characters as though we already know them, like "the Jakal" as opposed to "a jakal". It's just a subtle thing, but I like it.
plus one
Coming from you, goldie - I'm sorry, but for some reason this brings bands like Black Sabbath and Wolfmother XD
Not quite sure why...
Its very much Mastodon and Gojira inspired lol
But I can see how someone without a background in that kinda music will make different connections :P