We All Fall Down
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The edge of the white plastic window bites into my thighs as I swing my legs over the sill and into the cool night air. Glancing down, I see three stories splayed beneath my bare feet. A tiny raindrop falls from the ether to land upon my exposed flesh, and I flinch. It’s cold tonight, despite the fact that it’s only early September. I feel a light breeze lift the hair that flows over my shoulders, caressing my face with gentle hands, enveloping me. Bracing my too-pale arms against the unfeeling frame of the window, I scoot forward so that my finely clad posterior rests on the smooth white ledge. I’m all dressed up for tonight, the lavender dress clings to my thin frame just the way it always has, just as it whispered it would as I dragged its flowing entity from the hanger where it had once known peace. Slowly pushing myself closer to the oppressive darkness beyond the safe haven of my room, I turn my head to ensure that the only private space I had ever known remains still and quiet, undisturbed by my own inner turmoil. Having established it is so, I return my attention to the task at hand. An inch at a time, I tell myself, you can do this. Deep breaths flood my lungs with icy night, and I give one last shove to propel my already limp figure over the edge into oblivion.
In my mind’s eye, I can see myself etched against the midnight sky, a ghostly bird out for one last flight. The silvery folds of my dress float around me, my golden hair surrounds my face like a halo. It’s a shame, I think to myself with a faint smile, I’ve finally gotten the beauty I wanted, and no one’s here to see my one and only moment of gratification. These words float in my head, but they only barely manage to arrange themselves in a coherent fashion before all the meaningless letters are wiped away and my mind becomes as empty and impenetrably black as the moonless night beyond.
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